Who is writing Your Story?

If you do not like the Story you’re living…It’s time to sit down with the Author and have a “Heart to Heart” Chat. Who’s the Author of Your Story…YOU! That should be Great news for all of us to hear, because if we’re the Authors of our own story, Then we can change it to read any way we want it to.

One of my favorite Peanut’s Cartoon Clips is when Charlie Brown is complaining to Linus about how his lunch is the same everyday, and he hates it. Then Linus asks him…“Who makes your lunch?’ Charlie Brown answers…“I Do” . It seems so ridiculously obvious to us that Charlie Brown is in complete control of what he puts in his lunch, he could enjoy something different everyday if he really wanted to change.

But, What about each one of us? Aren’t we the ones in control of our own Story? We’ve all heard the definition of Insanity, which is: “Continuing to do the same thing over and over, and expecting different results”  I don’t know about you, but I want different results… I Want To Change My Story!

How Do We Change Our Story?

The first step is to begin with the end in mind. In Steven Covey’s Ground Breaking best selling book, The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People, Habit #2 is:  Begin With The End In Mind. Essentially, Dr. Covey says that we will never create the reality of the life we want to live, until we first create it in our mind.

We must be able to visualize the life we want to live. Think about where you want to live, what will your income level be, how will you impact your community, how will your influence impact your children, what will you do vocationally, what kind of marriage do you want, and what will your legacy be? Changing your Story will probably  not begin with Chapter 1. When you Change Your Story, it doesn’t mean that you erase everything from your past and start over, it’s more of a pivoting point in your life when you decide it’s time to live the life you were born to live.

Every Good Story…

Every good Story reaches a point when everything changes. Once we can see the life we want to live, we need to understand what needs to happen for our vision to become a reality. We need to ask ourselves some more questions: What kind of husband do I need to be in order to have the kind of marriage I want? What activities can I do with my kids to make sure I am having a positive impact on their lives? How will I get into the career field that fits my personality, skills, and my passion? and what needs to change in my finances to be free to live the life I truly desire?

Asking these questions will put us on a path towards Changing Our Story.

The Action Scene!

Stories never change without Action! I have spent more than enough time envisioning the life I want to live, I have even devoted countless hours asking and answering the questions we just talked about, but I often find myself paralyzed when it’s time to take Action. Dreaming, Thinking, and Planning are all very necessary components to Changing Your Story, but they don’t mean much until you do something.

The approach that has finally been working for me is: Small Action Steps Are Better Than No Action Steps. In other words, start small. Pick one small thing that you can do in each of the major roles in your life…and Take Action!!! If you start today with a few simple action items you will begin to pickup momentum and feel more inspired to Change Your Story.

Today is the Best day to start to Change Your Story, and begin being more Intentional about Your Legacy.

Blessings,

Randell

Last week I posted a blog about not getting caught up in your past, not letting your past failures keep you from moving forward…I actually said “the past doesn’t even exist”. But maybe we should look back from time to time, after all, there can be a lot of value in retracing  parts of our story.

When Should we Look Back?

I can think of three good reasons to look back in our history:

1. When we can Learn Something
2. For Motivation
3. To Build Confidence

Look Back to Learn Something:

Some of our greatest learning opportunities come from some of our most difficult times. Several years ago I was in the residential construction business and occasionally we would have a project that wasn’t very profitable, in fact, some we actually lost money. I would spend hours looking back at what went wrong.

I would ask questions like: did we order too much material, did we source our material from the wrong vendor, did we have more labor hours than we anticipated, were we encumbered by poor site conditions, or was the weather a major factor?…Then the big question, How can we prevent this from happening again?

The key point is, not to let prior mistakes, or poor judgement keep you from moving forward. Look back to learn, then proceed forward with more knowledge.

Look Back For Motivation!

There is just something about looking back at past success and past failures to motivate us to even better future results. I have used some of my earlier speaking presentations to motivate me to improve my presentation skills in order to have greater impact on y audience.

What’s interesting is that I have been motivated by poor performances because I didn’t want to feel that sense of failure again, and I’ve been motivated by some pretty good presentations because I loved the results and wanted to experience those results more consistently.

Look for past experiences that will motivate you to experience better results.

To Build Confidence.

There are two great ways to build confidence:  The first is to take action and do it well, and the other actually makes the first easier…look back at times when you were victorious over difficult circumstances. Take some time to remember overcoming obstacles to experience great results.

If you look back through your life, you will be amazed at some of the things you’ve been able to accomplish despite challenging circumstances. Go ahead and be a little impressed with yourself from time to time…people love to do business with confident people, not arrogant, but confident. We need to seek humility, but there is nothing wrong with allowing past successes help propel future achievements.

Looking Back Can Create Forward Momentum!

Take a few minutes and look back to Learn, Be Motivated, and to gain Confidence, it’s a great step forward in being more Intentional About Our Legacy!

Blessings,

Randell

There’s Really Only Two Responses To Your Past:

#1.   Allow your past drag you down, or

#2.   Let your past motivate you to press on to a brighter future

Your History Can Either Control You, Or It Can Empower You!

In his book The Travelers Gift, Andy Andrews says…”Do not let your History control your Destiny”

Is your past holding you hostage like your standing in Quicksand? Are you wearing your bad decisions like a pair if hipboots full of mud?

It’s Time To STOP!

You cannot move forward while looking backward with regret, shame, or embarrassment…the past is the past. The past doesn’t even exist. All we can control is now, and where we go from here. It’s time to stop waisting  prescious energy beating ourselves up over past mistakes, failures, and poor judgement, even though the consequences of the past may still be present.

My friend Kent Julian has a formula that he shares in his presentations all across the country. Kents says: E+R=O. The E stands for Events in our lives, the R stands for our Response to those events, and O stands for Outcome. In others words, our Response to the Events in our lives, determines our Outcome. It’s a simple formula, but if applied intentionally in our lives daily, our future will be one that has massive impact, and a positive influence on our world…the coolest part is, that it’s OUR choice!

I’ve been in Quicksand:

If you’ve spent any time at all reading this blog, then you know that I’ve been hung up in the quicksand of past defeats and failures. For far too long I allowed a few bad decisions hold me captive. I would question my own qualifications to help struggling entrepreneurs because of my own mistakes in business, and life. The real fact of the matter is, that those mistakes have actually been an education for me to help other frustrated entrepreneurs get “their lives back” too. The rugged terrain I’ve traveled as an entrepreneur makes me a better guide to those traveling a similar path.

One Last Thing About The Past:

Each of us must take complete responsibility for our past, we must own our past, but we do not need to wear our past like a scarlet letter into our future. Don’t let your past control your destiny. Your destiny is your destiny regardless of your past.

So…Quicksand Or Trampoline?

Back to the original question…Is your past going to suck you down like quicksand, or spring you onward  like a trampoline into a bright and purposeful future. Your Response to the Events in your past determine the future Outcome of your life, and the impact you’ll have on this world.

Being Intentional about your Response is a great step toward being Intentional about your Legacy!

Blessings,

Randell

A couple of weeks ago Ivan Bickett asked if I would offer my “One Thing” suggestion for his website.  Ivan asked if there was only  ”One Thing” I could tell someone just starting out in their own new business, what would that “One Thing” be.  This was my response:

FEED THE FARMER B4 THE ANIMALS

If I could only share “one Thing” with someone just going into business, it would be this…”Feed The Farmer B4 The Animals”. Using the metaphor of you as the farmer, and the animals as your business, you need to be “well” in order to grow a healthy business.

Our Family During The Early Business Years

This has not always been my philosophy, but I wish it would have been.  In 1997 I walked away from a job with great pay, great benefits, and tons of flexibility to pursue the dream of self employment.  My wife and I had four kids, our oldest was 13 at the time, and the youngest was 4, yes we were just entering the most expensive years of raising a family…what was I thinking?

The way I had it figured was, if we don’t feed the business first, then it will not be able to provide for us, which makes perfect sense, and carries an element of truth, but is fundamentally way off. If you travel this path long enough you will probably end up frustrated at home, and blaming your business for it…after all it gets everything first.  I made the same mistake that many business owners make, of always paying themselves last.

The business bills always came first, the electric bill, gas bill, advertising bills, job material bills, while bills at home went unpaid, or paid at the last possible minute, including our mortgage.

After battling this for years, I finally realized that I needed to pay myself first.  Just as the farmer cannot properly care for his animals if he is not strong and healthy, we as business owners cannot give our business the attention it needs if our own core needs are not being met. For instance, how can we possibly have the energy to focus on our business if we are worried that our electricity will be turned off at home, if we can’t afford groceries for our family, or if we’re avoiding phone calls from bill collectors.  These distractions steal our energy, rob us of our creativity, cause pain in our relationships, and shoot huge holes in our confidence.

Our Family All These Years Later

To build a strong and healthy business, we as business owners need to be giving our best self…we need to be “whole”.  Here is a quick example of how to prioritize the finances of your new business:

1. Pay your Taxes First…do not pay anything until you pay your taxes. Despite what you may have read, the IRS is not that friendly.  If you don’t pay your taxes, they will visit you, usually without an appointment, and at the worst possible moment.
2. Take care of your Family’s Core Needs.  Pay yourself enough to cover Food, Shelter, Utilities, and Clothing. Once these basic needs are met, it is a lot easier to focus on growing your business.
3. Pay business bills.
4. At this point it comes down to Values. Invest in family fun, and business growth as you see fit.

If you will practice these principles you can avoid much of the stress and pain of starting and growing a business that will leave a Legacy for years to come.

“Randell Mark” Olson,  The Intentional Legacy Group, LLC

Have you ever had the opportunity to watch yourself, when you didn’t know you were looking? That’s sounds kind of creepy I know…let me try to explain what I mean.

Last weekend, my wife Karen and I were at a graduation open house, where someone was walking around with a video camera catching some live footage of this special day. The interesting thing is, that I was completely unaware of this video camera until I was shown a copy of it later.

As I watched myself on video, I found it strange to know that at the time I had no idea that I was being watched. It was a rare opportunity to see myself as the world sees me.

The first thing I noticed was that I am shorter and wider than I thought…my hair is grayer than I thought as well. But what really got my attention was how my approach and response to various people was so vastly different.

Some people I would approach rather aggressively with a big hug, a slap on the back, and lots of laughter, while others I would address slowly with a gentle embrace, and a tender word, or a handshake with a smile.

Why The Difference?

I felt like a private investigator as I watched myself interact with family, friends, and acquaintances. I couldn’t help but notice that I seemed to know how to approach each person in a way that would be most acceptable to them.

Could There Be A Business Lesson Here?

I think so. The reason I was able to give the proper greeting and response to so many people at this open house, was because I understood how most of them want to interact…you might say “I know how they’re wired”, and their response can be quite predictable.

In business our customers and clients are all wired differently as well, and if we take the time to understand them better the results can be staggering. Just think how much better you can serve your customer  if you have a clearer sense of their unique perspective and what they would see as the perfect outcome.

We’ve all heard it said that “People do Business with people they Know, Like, and Trust” and there is no better way to earn that than to show them that you care, by getting to know them better.  It’s all part of being more Intentional about our Legacy.

Or was that the day before yesterday…

Does it seem that everyday is the same?  Is your main goal everyday, just to endure it, and make it to the end of the day and into bed safely?

What happens from the time you get up in the morning, until you go to bed at night?  Are you doing things intentionally that will have lasting impact, or are you just trying to survive the day?

Snap out of it…and LIVE!!!

Try these 3 techniques to change your life:

1. Identify your Values: Spend some time alone, and think about the things you care about most,  (God, family, friends, community, life, freedom, the homeless, money…etc.) and list them out on paper.
2. Have Impact: Pick at least two of the items on your list, and seek to have a positive impact on them everyday.  Pick one or two things you can do everyday to bless that person, or add value to that cause.
3. Share It: Share with others what you’re doing,  ask them the same questions, and challenge them to do the same.

These 3 simple actions can have an incredible impact on our lives, as well as the things we value most.

When we Identify our values, take steps daily to enhance them, and ask others to do the same, we add purpose to our daily routine, and positively impact our world.

Let’s stop letting the hours pass by in mediocrity,   let’s start being Intentional about our Legacy so each day will truly be a refection of who we really are.