8 Reasons People Don’t Change Their Story

 Reason #2:  Fear

Fear of Failure, and Fear of Success

What are we so afraid of? We’re afraid to fail because we may look like a stupid, naïve dreamer, and we’re afraid to succeed because we’re so unfamiliar with it.

Let’s talk about Fear of Failure first. I believe that the root of fear of failure is Pride. Failing would threaten the public, and private perception of who we are, the way other people see us, and the way we view ourselves. Failure would blow our cover and reveal our gaping vulnerabilities that no one ever knew we had. Fear also tells us that we’ll fail Big!…not just a little misstep, but massive public humiliation – so let’s just play it safe.

Fear of Failure often keeps us from even taking that first step because we’re afraid our Dream will go public. Yes, other people will now find out that we have a Big Hairy Dream!. Let’s face it, it’s uncomfortable to let people know that we’re breaking out of the status quo…they can stay behind if they want to, but we’re moving forward. We don’t want people to think we’re being ridiculous with our Big Dream especially if we fail and need to be consoled by them later.

When it comes right down to it, our fear of failure has more to do with what people are going to think of us than the actual failure itself. If we can keep failure in the proper perspective and view it as the necessary steps to climbing the mountain of success we’ll be able to conquer this fear and stop hiding behind our pile of failures, and begin standing on top of them…we’ll be that much closer to the top.

And then there is the Fear of Success. It may be hard to believe, but the fear of success is just as prevalent as the fear of failure. One of the reasons we may fear success is that we have an incorrect idea of what success really is. If we, or our peers have held successful people in distain, it stands to reason that we would fear the assumptions that other people have about us. Success could be defined simply as accomplishing a goal that we have set for ourselves in any area of our life, but for a broader view, and for the purpose of this discussion, I’ll define success…Continually progressing to improve ourselves in the most important roles of our lives, while joyfully pursuing and achieving the life and mission our Creator has called us to. Knowing, understanding, and communicating this mission, and the necessary achievements to be successful in it can bring us great fear and anxiety.

What will our friends and family think of the “new Successful Us”?

Why do I deserve to be successful anyway?

If I’m successful, what am I going to do next?

We all understand that with Success, comes, Responsibility…are we ready for it?

Can we handle the new expectations and demands on our time?

For most of us, we’re not going to go from a complete unknown to being on all the network TV shows overnight, but I truly believe that it’s our Creator’s desire that we be successful in the mission He has planned for us, let’s not allow our Fears sabotage His plans.

One small step is the beginning to pushing fear out of the way, start small and keep going, you will Change Your Story…When You Change Your Story, You Change Your World.

Blessings,

Randell

Even Hungry Birds Keep Coming To An Empty Birdfeeder

Why do birds keep coming back to  an empty feeder? I have four birdfeeders at my house that I keep full of birdseed all winter long, but come late spring I stop refilling them until the following fall. I’ve noticed something a bit interesting to me – the birds keep coming all summer long, even though the feeder is completely empty.

I will watch the same bird land on the feeder, examine it intently, and fly back to a tree branch 30 or 40 feet away. He will sit on the tree branch for a moment and then fly back to the same feeder and examine it again. This same bird will do this over and over again until I just stop watching…it’s probably doing it right now.

Why would a bird continue to waste it’s energy returning to something that is unfulfilling, and completely unsatisfying. It seems that he would realize that this opportunity has dried up, and he could better feed his family searching among the berries and seeds of the field…it’s got to be better than the store bought food anyway.

This bird has allowed something that was once a promising opportunity, trap him in a life of mediocrity that will eventually lead to his destruction if he doesn’t make a change soon.

Opportunity Or Trap?

This blog post was inspired by a piece I read in Andy Andrews book, Mastering The Seven Decisions. Andy says: “Way too many people trade out their freedom for security, and they don’t even realize it. There’s a difference between an opportunity you seize and a trap you walk into.”

Not every door that is opened for us is the right door for us to walk through, it could even be a trap. I am currently working with a gentleman who is considering a new position with a huge international company. It’s a GREAT opportunity…or is it? Here’s the deal – this move would require that he relocate and leave an area that he loves. This occupation is also 180 degrees from his true passion, which is medical research. But, But, But…It’s a GREAT opportunity, with GREAT benefits,  with a GREAT income, with a chance to advance with the company, and probably move around some more.

This Is How We Get Trapped!

The problem with chasing the wrong opportunities is that they can trap us in a mediocre life, we’ve all heard the saying that Good is the Enemy of Great…and it’s true. We tend to settle for goodness to the point that we miss real opportunities for Greatness! When we pursue the wrong opportunities it’s kind of like boarding the Titanic…it looks so promising, but in the end it is so destructive. We long to be free and live the life we were born to live, and until we are, we are not really living fully alive.

Avoid The Trap!

Here are 3 quick tips to avoid the trap:

1. Know Yourself…Understand what you’re Passionate about, and what it is that you Value most. Uncover your Personality traits, Do you like to be around people? Do you enjoy a fast paced life or prefer a little more relaxed pace? Are you a big picture thinker, or would you rather focus on the details? Determine your Skills and Abilities.
2. Evaluate Every Opportunity…Run every opportunity through the filter of the answers to item #1. Is it an opportunity you’re passionate about, and does it align with your Values? Does it lend well to your Personality? Do you have the Skills and Abilities to carry out the functions of this opportunity with Excellence?
3. Will it meet the needs of your Family…Financially, Socially, Spiritually, Enviromentally, and Relationally?

If you Evaluate every opportunity against these criteria, you are well on your way to Avoiding the Trap, and being more Intentional About Your Legacy.

Blessings,

~Randell

Last week I posted a blog about not getting caught up in your past, not letting your past failures keep you from moving forward…I actually said “the past doesn’t even exist”. But maybe we should look back from time to time, after all, there can be a lot of value in retracing  parts of our story.

When Should we Look Back?

I can think of three good reasons to look back in our history:

1. When we can Learn Something
2. For Motivation
3. To Build Confidence

Look Back to Learn Something:

Some of our greatest learning opportunities come from some of our most difficult times. Several years ago I was in the residential construction business and occasionally we would have a project that wasn’t very profitable, in fact, some we actually lost money. I would spend hours looking back at what went wrong.

I would ask questions like: did we order too much material, did we source our material from the wrong vendor, did we have more labor hours than we anticipated, were we encumbered by poor site conditions, or was the weather a major factor?…Then the big question, How can we prevent this from happening again?

The key point is, not to let prior mistakes, or poor judgement keep you from moving forward. Look back to learn, then proceed forward with more knowledge.

Look Back For Motivation!

There is just something about looking back at past success and past failures to motivate us to even better future results. I have used some of my earlier speaking presentations to motivate me to improve my presentation skills in order to have greater impact on y audience.

What’s interesting is that I have been motivated by poor performances because I didn’t want to feel that sense of failure again, and I’ve been motivated by some pretty good presentations because I loved the results and wanted to experience those results more consistently.

Look for past experiences that will motivate you to experience better results.

To Build Confidence.

There are two great ways to build confidence:  The first is to take action and do it well, and the other actually makes the first easier…look back at times when you were victorious over difficult circumstances. Take some time to remember overcoming obstacles to experience great results.

If you look back through your life, you will be amazed at some of the things you’ve been able to accomplish despite challenging circumstances. Go ahead and be a little impressed with yourself from time to time…people love to do business with confident people, not arrogant, but confident. We need to seek humility, but there is nothing wrong with allowing past successes help propel future achievements.

Looking Back Can Create Forward Momentum!

Take a few minutes and look back to Learn, Be Motivated, and to gain Confidence, it’s a great step forward in being more Intentional About Our Legacy!

Blessings,

Randell

What does IQ really stand for?

I’m sure we are all familiar with the term IQ, it is commonly accepted as the term to identify one’s intelligence, thus,” Intelligence Quotient“, or IQ. However, is there perhaps an even more important value we could measure and designate in a similar way? Maybe we could examine our Real IQ and refer to it as  RIQ… “Real Impact Quotient”. I do not want to get into the discussion of the value of IQ versus the value of  RIQ other than to say this… If I had to choose, I would choose Real Impact over intelligence any day, fortunately I believe we can share both.

What’s this all about?

I was considering the value of time,  time spent, time invested, time wasted, time lived, and most important, time still yet to live. So I did what any logical human being would do, I went to Google. As it turns out, according to the U.S. Census Bureau the projected life expectancy in 2010 was 78.3 years.

That statistic got my attention Big Time because I realized that I had most likely already lived more than 60% of my life. Quite honestly it scared me, I started wondering… what difference have I made, what impact have I had, and how have I changed this world. I began to question the amount of time I still had left, and would the  amount of Time I had left  be the deciding factor in the ultimate impact I would have on my family, my community, my clients, and this world?

I Loved The Answer

The great news is that our RIQ is not limited by time. I have spent a very limited amount of time with some people that have had a major impact on my life, and to the contrary, I have also spent a great deal of time with some people who had practically no positive impact on my life at all. Sometimes just a word or phrase can change a persons life. Zig Ziglar said that his whole life changed when someone simply told him that “he could do it”, and believed in him…hard telling what kind of RIQ Zig Ziglar has had on this world, and it all started with someone caring enough to instill confidence in a struggling salesman.

How Can We Increase Our RIQ?

• Discover your Purpose, your Calling…The best way to have the most Impact is to know what you were born to do. Pay attention to your desires…they were not put in you to taunt you, they are in you to guide you.

• Develop your natural strengths, skills, and abilities…The best way to enhance your Impact, is to leverage the things you are already naturally good at and have interests in.

• Put together a Plan…Allow your Passions, Dreams, and Values to guide your Goals and begin to layout a Plan of Action.

• Take Action…Make deposits of service in peoples lives. Ultimate Impact is a result of unselfish service.

Real Impact Quotient…RIQ Goes On Forever

Your RIQ becomes your Legacy. There is no doubt that we could make a pretty impressive list of famous people who have profoundly impacted this world, but my hunch is that the ones with the most Amazing RIQs, are the ones quietly serving and sharing there gifts among us everyday…Maybe It’s You!

Begin today growing your Impact, enhance your Real IQ and be more Intentional about your Legacy!

Blessings,

Randell

Our Response Determines our Future:

In Wednesdays Blog Post I referenced Kent Julian’s Success formula E+R=O…What I didn’t know at the time was that on the very same day, Kent had posted a powerful video on YouTube of a portion of his keynote presentation where he illustrates this life changing discipline.

I asked Kent if I could share that video with you here…Thanks Kent, What an Incredible message for us all.

If you enjoyed Kent’s presentation, be sure to “Like” it in the upper right hand corner once you hit play.

There’s Really Only Two Responses To Your Past:

#1.   Allow your past drag you down, or

#2.   Let your past motivate you to press on to a brighter future

Your History Can Either Control You, Or It Can Empower You!

In his book The Travelers Gift, Andy Andrews says…”Do not let your History control your Destiny”

Is your past holding you hostage like your standing in Quicksand? Are you wearing your bad decisions like a pair if hipboots full of mud?

It’s Time To STOP!

You cannot move forward while looking backward with regret, shame, or embarrassment…the past is the past. The past doesn’t even exist. All we can control is now, and where we go from here. It’s time to stop waisting  prescious energy beating ourselves up over past mistakes, failures, and poor judgement, even though the consequences of the past may still be present.

My friend Kent Julian has a formula that he shares in his presentations all across the country. Kents says: E+R=O. The E stands for Events in our lives, the R stands for our Response to those events, and O stands for Outcome. In others words, our Response to the Events in our lives, determines our Outcome. It’s a simple formula, but if applied intentionally in our lives daily, our future will be one that has massive impact, and a positive influence on our world…the coolest part is, that it’s OUR choice!

I’ve been in Quicksand:

If you’ve spent any time at all reading this blog, then you know that I’ve been hung up in the quicksand of past defeats and failures. For far too long I allowed a few bad decisions hold me captive. I would question my own qualifications to help struggling entrepreneurs because of my own mistakes in business, and life. The real fact of the matter is, that those mistakes have actually been an education for me to help other frustrated entrepreneurs get “their lives back” too. The rugged terrain I’ve traveled as an entrepreneur makes me a better guide to those traveling a similar path.

One Last Thing About The Past:

Each of us must take complete responsibility for our past, we must own our past, but we do not need to wear our past like a scarlet letter into our future. Don’t let your past control your destiny. Your destiny is your destiny regardless of your past.

So…Quicksand Or Trampoline?

Back to the original question…Is your past going to suck you down like quicksand, or spring you onward  like a trampoline into a bright and purposeful future. Your Response to the Events in your past determine the future Outcome of your life, and the impact you’ll have on this world.

Being Intentional about your Response is a great step toward being Intentional about your Legacy!

Blessings,

Randell

Do you ever have a hard time getting motivated?  Even when it’s something your passionate about, and really Love to do, sometimes it’s just tough to get going.

Take 3 minutes and watch this video to use a tip that I use…It seems to work everytime!!!

I would love to know how you get over the hump to stay motivated

Yes, I’ve actually been held at Gunpoint

When I was 18 years old, my first job right out of high school was working in a small plastics factory in a not so good area of town. I worked a night shift where we started at 6 PM and worked until 6 AM, we would work three days on and then we would have the next three days off, at which point we would start another three day cycle.

One night at about 2 AM a man came in the building and was talking to a fellow employee, the rest of us assumed he was a friend bringing lunch or something. There was only three of us working that night so when our fellow employee called us over to his workstation we thought he was going to introduce us to his friend.

When we arrived at his workstation the intruder pulled out a gun, held us at gunpoint and demanded we hand over our wallets. Once he had our wallets in hand, he had all three of us line up against the wall, and then he had us lay on our bellies with our hands straight out in front of us…

My Life Passed Before My Eyes

I’m sure you’ve heard it said that just before you die, your entire life passes before your eyes. Well, I’m here to tell you, that’s the truth, thousands of freeze-frame moments passed before my eyes in a split second, I literally saw my entire life in slow motion in the blink of an eye.

Obviously  the intruder finally left and we were all still alive, yet in that moment we were frozen while our life passed before us. We were “held up”, but we were not in control. Most of the time in life, when we are “held up” its of our own making.

So what’s your Hold-Up?

What’s holding you up while your life passes by? Is it fear? Is a lack of confidence? Lack of knowledge? Are you too young? Or are you too old?… Whatever it is, now is the time to take action.  Start today by taking one step, every journey starts with the first step, stop waiting for everything to be perfect, start where you’re at today, and activate the gifts and talents you already have by taking that first step and change your world.

Stop waiting…It’s Time to Pull the Trigger

An Extraordinary Legacy doesn’t just happen…We must be Intentional, Start today by taking the first step towards an Intentional Legacy!!!

Blessings,

~Randell

Are You At The End Of Your Rope?

If you are at the end of your rope in your work or your business, a longer rope may help for a while but it is definitely not the answer. A longer rope, such as a promotion, a few days off, a special project, or a raise in pay, may rejuvenate you for a while, but ultimately a longer rope would just serve as a diversion, and soon you will find yourself at the end of it once again.

My Finger Prints Are Embedded At The End Of The Rope!

I have dangled at the end of many ropes myself. I have stretched ropes by creating new ideas, going after new emerging markets, and chasing the next big thing, only to find myself in that familiar place once again, at the end of the rope. Stretching the rope buys you a little more time, but each time you stretch the rope it gets a little thinner and harder to hold onto, eventually something is going to give.

I was climbing the wrong rope!

When I finally found the right rope it made all the difference for me. Don’t get me wrong the climb is still hard, it still takes determination, persistence, personal development, and an investment of time, but it is worth it all because of “one thing”…Vision!

What’s at the other end of the rope?

You see, there must be a worthy goal at the other end of the rope, something that means more to you than almost anything else, it’s the one thing that you must see come to realization in your life. It is a goal that you can put your whole heart behind, it is what you go to bed thinking about and what you wake up thinking about, it’s the smile on your face and at the same time it’s a concerned look in your eye. It is in fact your Vision, and until you identify it, you will find yourself at the end of the rope over and over again.

Vision is fuel for successful living!

The Bible says” without vision the people perish” Proverbs 29:18.

Use these three simple exercises to gain clarity on your Vision.

1. Identify Your Values…What do you care about?,  What do you believe in wholeheartedly ?, What moves you to action?
2. What desires has God placed in your heart? …What accomplishments of others cause you to celebrate?  Make a list of things that make you smile. Who do you admire  for their impact on history?
3. Think about the perfect day… What would your perfect day look like?  Where would you be?  Who would be with you? What would you be celebrating?  What would you be most grateful for?

Pondering these thoughts will go a long way towards helping you identify the Vision you have for your Career, Business, and Life. Defining and drawing your Vision is one of the first steps of being Intentional about your Legacy!!!

Blessings,

Randell Mark

Have you ever thought of time as currency? In many ways that is exactly what it is, especially if you are paid by how much time you spend working. If you are trading your time for money then in a very real sense time is currency.  The reality is that you are actually purchasing dollars with your time. The problem with this arrangement is that you only have just so much time, obviously when you run out of time your opportunity to purchase more money then vanishes as well.

Following this logic, is wealth measured in time then or measured in dollars… I would suggest neither is an appropriate measurement of wealth. Wealth can be best measured by the value your time creates for you or someone else. For example:   If I am hired to give a speech for $1100, and I invest 10 hours researching and writing my speech, and one hour actually delivering my speech, you could say I just earned $100 per hour. However the wealth does not stop there, assuming the content of my speech added value to those listening, the potential wealth continues on with each person in attendance. To take this one step further, if I take that same speech and put it on a CD and offer it for sale, the potential income for me and the potential added value for anyone who purchased the CD for all practical purposes is infinite.

At the beginning of each year, at the beginning of each month, at the beginning of each week, and at the beginning of each day, we all start with the same amount of time. Each of us has a choice whether to spend our time purchasing dollars, or invest our time creating value for ourselves and others.

By investing our time in Personal Development and People Development we can change our world and be more Intentional about our Legacy.

~Randell Mark Olson